I am embarrassed to admit that I long had a problem with being late, especially in my youth, and working with people who were never on time either. It became a vicious cycle. If my clients and colleagues were always late, while I was on time, I started to think there was no point to being punctual. On the other hand, if I was the one late while others were on time, they would think that I was being so cavalier about time, and then they wouldn't see the point of being on time the next occasion. And so it goes...what goes around, comes around, and everyone ends up being late, no one is on time.
I used to excuse my tardiness as being "fashionably late"; I was under the mistaken notion that to be early or on time was inelegant, because I looked too eager. Another misconception was that the person who wields true power arrives later or last for any rendezvous. Yet another twisted logic was that all times were purposely listed at least 30 minutes to an hour early, so that people would arrive just on time, which is really thirty to sixty minutes later.
As I got older, as my clock presumably started ticking, I started realizing, belatedly(pardon the pun), that time is precious, and should not be wasted or treated cavalierly. Since it was a diminishing commodity, it needed to be rationed and managed efficiently.
As I got older, as my exposure to best business practices widened, I realized too, belatedly again (ahem), that time was literally money. Each person was a resource with a value, and that astute business transactions occurred when the value of a resource was maximized for the most return to an enterprise.
As I got older, as I became more and more punctual, and was at the receiving end of many a tardy appointment, I became increasingly annoyed and slighted, realizing belatedly yet again that as I sat waiting, I was unproductive, and I was disrespected, that my time was not worth anything, hence it could easily be dismissed.
As I got older, I realized again that "fashionably late" could not possibly be fashionable. Dramatic entrances were effective only if they were unwitting and rare. Even the stars of Hollywood, made it to the red carpet on time to catch the start of the program, not its end.
As I got older, I realized that my time and attention were more valuable than wealth, titles and accomplishments, and were the priceless extensions of my own perceived worth. And so everyone's time was important, and needed to be regarded with respect.
Good manners and right conduct, the etiquette of many ages, dictate that one must be on time, always. It is "bad form" to be tardy. To be late once, may be excused due to external factors out of one's usual control, such as traffic congestion, an emergency, a sudden problem of great proportions, a sudden downpour. To be late a second time, suggests a lack of concern for time and the other person's interest. To be late a third time, is inexcusable. It is a chronic malady and a terrible habit!
So why was I so often late in the past?
Deep soul searching revealed some insights that might help others who are also as punctually challenged as I was.
First, respect for time must be taught by example at an early age. As a child, my example of precision came from school, the time when classes began and ended, and television, what time my favorite shows began and ended. Yet at home, there was little other opportunity to practice punctuality.
Second, respect for time must be ingrained in the culture. Countries like Japan and Switzerland are famous for the punctuality and consistency of their transport system. 12 minutes after the hour, meant 12 minutes after the hour, not a minute more or a minute less. The Philippines of my youth did not respect time. In broadcasting for example, there would often be dead air. On shows, so much time in the intro is spent on small talk that time for the meat of the matter is eaten away. Or else, very popular shows would not end on time and extend their programming to eat into the next show. In advertising, clients often pressured agencies to extend deadlines to the utmost, because for one reason or another, they themselves waited till the last minute to work on the approvals of materials. In parties, nobody ever came on time for fear of being regarded as gauche. Doctors made patients wait hours in their clinics simply because they didn't report for clinic on time in the first place. Hence the emergence of the concept of "Filipino time" to mean a people perennially late for everything.
Third, respect for time makes practical, lucrative sense. Each person is a resource worth a certain amount of money, easily computed on a per month, per week, or per day basis. Disrespecting the time of someone is wasting his or her potential contribution, and waste translates to a loss of opportunity, loss of revenue, loss of potential income and profit. And in a corporate setting, the tardiness of one professional could cause a domino effect on the workload and schedules of the other members of the team, such as forcing overtime, a state of affairs very few executives and employees like, and usually an indication of poor time management and corporate governance.
Fourth, respect for time is a discipline and habit that must be adopted deliberately, consciously, and practiced mindfully. At the end of the day, one CHOOSES to be on time, and must make the necessary efforts to be punctual. Traffic in Manila's streets can no longer be a valid excuse, because the congestion is chronic and perennial, so one should just leave earlier than usual to give allowance for the inevitable.
Fifth, tardiness is really a lack of self respect. It suggested that I not only did not respect other people's time, I also did not value my own. How little I thought of my self and my time that I allowed others to treat me so lightly and low as to be late for a meeting with me. Suddenly, my self esteem was in question and at issue!
The strategy that worked for me was TO STOP TRYING TO BE ON TIME! Instead, I TRY TO BE EARLY. Trying to be on time, usually gets me to my destination late, or barely on time. Trying to be early though gets me there JUST ON TIME. That simple distinction has made all the difference in my personal and corporate life.
I have tried to inculcate in my colleagues this newfound respect for time. Fining each other for tardiness to meetings was one drastic measure. Not waiting for each other to get to an appointment, but instead proceeding on my own to make it to the appointment ahead, even though alone, was another unpopular tactic. I have realized to my chagrin that most employees are early or on time only in the first month of their employment. The longer their tenure, the more haphazard their attendance record gets!
I have adopted other variations on this theme. I find myself now arriving at a party or event early to "show my face", and proving to the host who invited me that I did arrive, only early, and it enabled me to take a French leave at my leisure. I always have my phone and iPad on hand, fully charged, so that if I have to wait, I could still make productive use of my time through calls and writing. I call my appointment as I leave for it, and estimate to my appointment and myself the time it will take me to get there. This estimating exercise I find particularly helpful, because it enables me to control and manage the perception of my appointment. If I know I really will be late, God forbid, I call ahead to advise my appointment and give them the opportunity and option to reschedule, if they wish.
As for our dear country, there is hope too. We have recently established the concept of "Philippine Standard Time" as an effort to institutionalize and regiment a national habit of punctuality. Foreign shows and plays start exactly on time, and unceremoniously lock out the tardy till the second act.
My own endocrinologist hired a time manager to call up all her patients and set up a schedule of consultations purely by appointment, with most positive results. Where I used to wait three hours for a chance to see her, now I wait barely fifteen minutes before I am ushered in to her office. Her skills notwithstanding, I think her new system has contributed to my being a healthier, certainly happier patient!
My own track record is by no means perfect. I still find myself late for appointments occasionally, but they are the exception rather than the rule. The biggest compliment I received recently was the astounded expression of my appointment to be told that I was often late in the past. Her exact words were, "Are you sure? She has NEVER been late for our appointments. As a matter of fact, she is often early!"
Indeed, I have a long way to go before becoming like the obsessive philosopher Immanuel Kant, who was a person that the villagers set their clocks by, he was so precise and punctual about time. I would rather settle for being part of the new emerging professional standard of people who valued time enough to treat it with respect, share it sparingly and discriminatingly, and use it to help promote a new ethic of punctuality for our society.
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